Thursday, September 12, 2013

The Difference Between Men and Women Are Complimentary

"A psychiatrist once told me that in his experience the biggest difference between men and women generally is that women focus on what people need and men focus on what people deserve. At first I didn’t get it, but I’ve since come to see it makes a lot of sense. Female culture has deep roots in the care of infants. It knows that if you don’t give a baby everything it needs it will die. 

Much of what women need to give babies — breast milk — comes more or less automatically to them. So women most often can say, “yes” (though exhaustion and famine can make it difficult and even impossible).
Male culture has deep roots in providing material goods for women and children. 

It knows that if you always give a child everything it needs it will always be a child, it will always need and it will never deserve; it will never take care of itself much less help take care of others. Much of what men need to provide can be scarce and hard to come by. So men more often will say “no,” and often in saying “no” they are providing an important intangible: a lesson in survival and frugality...

Both points of view are valid and necessary. A band of humans totally dominated by one point of view would quickly die out. If babies got only what they earned, they would die in a few days because they can earn nothing.

If babies always got whatever they needed they would never grow to provide for themselves, to say nothing of providing for others. They would always be burdens, never assets, and would drag the tribe quickly to oblivion. Therefore, women cannot rightly claim that because they say “yes” more they care more."

"If Men Have All the Power How Come Women Make the Rules" pg 109

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